“It's hard to to be that present when you're looking at a bigger picture of trying to teach them well.”
Hilary Swank has been a mother for two years and she has already learned so much.
The 50-year-old “Yellowjackets” actress welcomed a set of twins — daughter Aya and son Ohm — in April 2023 with her husband Philip Schneider, whom she has been married to since 2018.
Now that Aya and Ohm are two years old, Swank is dishing on some of her parenting secrets.
RELATED: Kylie Kelce stresses the importance of being honest during pregnancy
Her first piece of advice? Refraining from using the phrase “terrible twos” when raising a 2-year-old.
The term is commonly used by parents to refer to the normal development stage that typically involves frequent tantrums, defiant behavior and saying “no” often as children start to find a sense of independence.
"There are moments of it, but I call it the teachable twos," Swank said in an exclusive interview with People at the 36th Annual Colleagues Spring Luncheon on May 8.
Swank was honored with the Colleagues Champion of Children Award at the event.
"I feel like they're just in this place where they're recognizing so many new things," she continued, “and it's gotta be really overwhelming to have everything that you see is new."
Swank goes on to explain that “teachable twos” is a much more “fitting” term for this phase in a kid’s life.
“Even your emotions that come with it, and not having your brain fully developed,” she added. “So when you want something, you just want it, you don't have logical thinking skills.”
But while toddler tantrums are inevitable, Swank does her best to maintain a level head.
"I think it's really important to regulate yourself and just stay calm and hold space for them," Swank told People of how she approaches a tantrum.
According to Johns Hopkins Medicine, most temper tantrums in toddlers last no longer than 15 minutes.
“The best thing to do when dealing with a toddler temper tantrum is to stay calm and actively ignore the behavior,” says Jennifer Katzenstein, Ph.D., of Johns Hopkins All Children’s Hospital.
“This means turning your eye gaze away from the child, you yourself engaging in a different behavior, and not speaking or interacting with the child,” she explains.
Swank describes herself as a ‘hands-on parent’
Swank, who had already won two Oscars and two Golden Globe awards by the time she became a mom, announced her pregnancy in October 2022.
Six months later, she announced the birth of her twins in an April 2023 Instagram post.
“It wasn’t easy. But boy (and girl!) was it worth it,” Swank wrote alongside a photo of her two little ones in her arms. “Happy Easter! Posting from pure Heaven.”
Her recent parenting advice comes one month after she opened up about being a first-time mom at 48.
“I would have had kids earlier. I’m not saying I actively waited until 47,” she said in a cover story for Women’s Health, published April 8.
“But that was a magical time in my life, when it all culminated. It was the right time for a myriad of reasons,” she added.
Waiting until her late-40s, Swank says, allowed her to “sink in and be present” with her twins — further describing herself as a “hands-on parent.”
ALSO ON MOD MOMS CLUB: Blake Lively says her children are her ‘lifeline’ amid ‘intense year’
“I’m really interested in their brains. I’m fascinated about what makes them tick. And I have my career that’s already established, so I’m not divided,” she added.
